IRREPLACEABLE: 2012

I tell Avery all the time that I want her to be 4 forever! I LOVE this age (minus her screaming all night long because she's afraid of her new room...another post for another day)! Lately I've realized how little time I have to raise my kids before they're grown up. That makes me SO SAD, so I'm hanging on to them while I have them! I tell Avery that she can't ever turn 5 because I don't want her to go to Kindergarten! Parker was a baby a few months ago, and now he's gone ALL DAY. Don't get me wrong...it's also been a joy watching Parker learn...he's a reading machine...but I miss having him home with me. So now that I know how fast the time goes that my babies are babies, I'm holding on tight! No more wishing time away! ( Although I'm okay with Lily moving on from the coloring on the walls and furniture, and dumping toilet cleaner with bleach all over the carpeted stairs phase). But I love my babies!

Here's a little post I wrote on FitMePink when we first moved...8 months ago! That was fast! We still miss Utah, but I'm much more adjusted than I was!

It seems that every time I start a blog post here on my beloved FitMePink, I start with an excuse as to why it's been so long since I last posted. This post will be no different. Last time we "spoke," I still lived in the-happy-little-bubble of West Jordan, Utah. A few months, a job offer, and a lot of prayers later, my family now resides in the far-away-somewhat-foreign-to-us land of Tennessee. I'm mentally and emotionally trying to accept the fact that we are here. It is beautiful. And my parents live here...yay! But I REALLY loved where we were. My life was busy and happy...just the way I like it! Life for me has come to a sort of screeching halt. I know it's time for me to find myself in this new place, but first things first...a thank-you note.

Dearest Utah,

I was taught at a young age the importance of sending a "thank you" note when someone gives me a gift. In keeping with this important lesson in etiquette, I just want to thank you for the lovely life you provided for me and my family over the course of the last five years. In fact, I actually owe my life to you. You were the place of my birth. My growing-up years were spent elsewhere, but to you I returned for a college degree, and even found myself a husband in your lovely, happy valley.

In fact, apart from a short time in another (warmer, sunnier) state, to this point in our married lives, we've pretty much called Utah "home." Thank you for feeling like home. Thank you for all the "firsts" you provided us with. Our first date, our first kiss, our engagement, our first married apartment, and even our first home.

Thank you for allowing our family to grow from a family of 3 in this Utah-home to a family of 5. The walls were busting at the seams with the pitter patter of tiny feet. These were years of "musical beds" when little ones were to scared to stay in their own. These were the years I got to spend every waking hour with my beautiful children before sending the first off to school. These were years of family walks, family bike rides, family dinners, family story time, and family prayer. Thank you for blessing my oldest son, born while we lived away, with two little sisters. Thank you for helping them be best friends.

And speaking of friends, thank you for putting some of the best friends I could ever hope for directly in my path. Thank you for taking them from different parts of the state, country and world, and landing them right where I needed them right when I needed them...in Utah. Thank you for play dates, friends who loved my

kids as their own, dinner swaps, singing groups, running buddies, trusted babysitters, and so much more.

Thank you for your beautiful roads, trails, mountains, and scenery. In your beautiful landscape, I not only developed a greater appreciation for God's creations, but also developed a love and passion for fitness. Many miles were logged onto my personal odometer as I watched the sun peak over the mountains to the east in the quiet hours of the morning.

Thank you for also placing in my path group fitness instructors who taught me that there's more to fitness than running! Because of these inspiring women, I developed a new attitude, outlook, and lifelong

fitness addiction! As I attended classes week after week, exercise became something I couldn't live without. It was no longer an option, but a scheduled part of my EVERY day. These women showed me by their

example that the human body is capable of amazing things. As a result, I've raced, I've pushed my limits, I've fulfilled a dream, and I've never looked back.

Thank you for inspiring me to start a fitness blog which has blessed my life more than it's blessed anyone else's. How could I not be dedicated to fitness when I was busy writing about it? Thank you for giving me inspiring friends through this blog...most of whom I've never met, and a few that I have.

Thank you also, dear Utah, for the gift of in-laws. In a place where my immediate family did NOT reside, you forced me to see my husband's family for the amazing people they are. If I'd chosen a husband based

on HIS family alone, I'd still be married to the same person. I now have relationships with his family I never would have hoped for had I not experienced life with them in the same place...in Utah. Besides just being my mother-father-sisters-brothers-in-law, I have friends. I have another set of "parents" I can comfortably

call "mom" and "dad," and the closest thing to having another sister.

And speaking of sisters, thank you for mine. Almost a year ago, I finally got to live close to her again...after nearly 10 years of living apart. Thank you for reminding me of how nice it is to have someone around who has loved me since the day I was born...who knows every detail about me and my life, and loves me anyway. Someone who can walk into my house piled high with toys, laundry, dirty dishes, and clutter, and truly not even notice. Someone who can knock on the door when my house is in shambles without sending me into a picking-up, panicked frenzy.

Thank you for cousins my kids love as their own siblings. Thank you for Baby Jack who's birth-in-Utah changed my life.

Thank you for Zumba. Thank you for making my current friendships stronger as we-as-friends danced and laughed together. Thank you for helping me go out of my own comfort zone to learn dances, let go of all inhibitions, and teach them to an audience of participants. Thank you for giving me one more thing I can share with my sister...Zumba. And thank you for giving me new friends through Zumba I wouldn't have made any other way.

Thank you for making my home a gathering place for out-of-town visitors, and a home-away-from home for my baby brother while he was living life as a single college student in happy valley. Thank you, also, for giving me a front row seat to watch his courtship with the only girl good enough to marry our baby brother...Anne.

I can't say life was perfect while I was in your borders, Utah. There were cold, long winters. There was heart-ache. There were lonely days. There were "Monster-Mom" days. There was yelling. There was crying. There was impatience and misunderstandings. But I guess I can't thank you for the good without also thanking you for the bad. Because the "bad" is what is sculpting me into the person I want to become. At times I felt like I was thrown kicking and screaming into the "refiner's fire." But through the tears, I got a little bit stronger. Apparently, however, it wasn't enough. We've moved out of your comforting borders into the unknown. Please tell your friend, Tennessee to be nice to me and my family, because at the moment, I'm

sure missing you, Utah. Cold winters and all.

Saying good-bye felt like one of the hardest things I've ever done. But saying good-bye also made me realize how blessed and loved we are! Thank you for the good-bye parties. Thank you for the tears. Thank

you for showing me how it feels to have true friends who feel like family. Thank you for reminding me of the importance and blessing of real family. Thank you for good neighbors, and cherished memories that will last a lifetime.

As I look back to my time in Utah, I feel blessed to have lived in a place so rich in the culture of what makes me ME. Really, there aren’t enough words of gratitude that will do justice to how I feel.

As I move forward with the ones in my life that matter most, I'll try to live by the words of Dr. Seuss, "Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened."

All I can say is, thank you.

Sincerely,

Robyn, wife, mother, southerner-in-training, westerner-at-heart.